


Sex And Sandwiches

by orphan_account



Category: Smosh, Video Blogging & YouTube RPF
Genre: Arguing, Casual Sex, Comedy, Food, Friends With Benefits, Friendship, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-01
Updated: 2013-02-01
Packaged: 2017-11-27 18:17:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/665009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ian can't remember if he's ever had sex with Anthony. Anthony just wants to make a sandwich.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sex And Sandwiches

“Hey, Ant?”  
  
Anthony turned away from the sandwich he was making at the counter. Ian was staring at him from the dining room table.  
  
“Yeah?” Anthony replied, leaning back against the counter.  
  
Ian gazed at him thoughtfully. “Have we ever fucked?” he asked casually.  
  
Anthony wasn’t sure he’d heard right.  _“Excuse me?”_  
  
“Have we ever fucked,” Ian repeated. “You know; banged, slept together,  _done it?_ ”  
  
Anthony shook his head in disbelief. “Shouldn’t  _you_  know the answer to that?”  
  
Ian shrugged. “I dunno, I get drunk and bang a lot of dudes. Just thought you might’ve been one of them at some point.”  
  
“Manwhore,” Anthony murmured under his breath, turning back to his sandwich.  
  
“What?”  
  
“I said you’re a manwhore,” Anthony stated, clearly this time.  
  
“Tell me something I don’t know,” Ian replied, smirking at Anthony’s turned back. “But you never answered the question.”  
  
“How can you not  _know?_ ” Anthony sighed.  
  
Ian rolled his eyes. “I’ve woken up alone and naked and hungover in my bed many times, dude. I thought maybe we might’ve fucked and then you were too awkward to bring it up again. It happens.”  
  
“I can’t believe you don’t know.”  
  
“So we did bang, then?”  
  
“No! I just meant... you know,  _if_  we did. Thought it might be significant or whatever.”  
  
“Significant?” Ian repeated.   
  
Anthony turned to face him once again, crossing his arms. “I’m your best friend, dude. That means  _something_ , doesn’t it? You shouldn’t just...  _forget_  whether we’ve had sex or not.”  
  
Ian grinned. “Let me get this straight. You’re offended because we  _didn’t_  have sex and I  forgot about it?”  
  
“Well...” Anthony trailed off, blushing. It  _did_  sound pretty stupid when you put it that way. “Whatever,” he finished lamely. He finally finished spreading the mustard on his sandwich and turned the sink on to rinse off the lettuce. God, when did making a sandwich become such a long process? He could still feel Ian’s stupid grin behind him.  
  
“Manwhore,” he muttered again. Suddenly, he jumped as he felt a pair of arms encircling his waist from behind.  
  
“Wh-what are you doing?” he asked, mentally cursing his voice for stuttering.  
  
Ian spun him around so that he was face to face with that stupid, smug,  _infuriating_  grin.  
  
“Anthony,” he said. “Do you wanna have sex with me?”  
  
“No!” Anthony protested. Ian raised an eyebrow, and Anthony sighed in defeat. “Maybe. Only if you don’t, you know, forget about it later.”  
  
Ian smiled, less cocky than before and maybe a little bit affectionate. He leaned in to kiss Anthony, slowly but deeply, his tongue slipping insistently into Anthony’s mouth. Anthony couldn’t help letting out a soft moan.  
  
Ian pulled away a little, just enough to whisper against Anthony’s earlobe; “Don’t worry. I have a feeling that this is going to be unforgettable.”  
  
Anthony couldn’t help grinning as Ian pulled him out of the kitchen by the hand, heading for the bedroom. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed his half-made sandwich still sitting on the counter. Oh well. He supposed that out of all the things that could cause him to abandon his probably-delicious sandwich, hot sex with his best friend wasn’t a bad choice.  
  
Well, not  _too_  bad anyway.  
  
He paused.  
  
“Ian?”  
  
Ian stopped as they reached the hallway. “Yeah?”  
  
“Can I finish making my sandwich first?”  
  
Ian just raised an eyebrow.   
  
Anthony sighed. “ _Fine._ ”  
  
Ian rolled his eyes, shaking his head as he pulled Anthony into his bedroom.  
  
“I’ll make you a new one after,” he promised, pulling Anthony’s shirt off over his head.   
  
Anthony grinned. Sex  _and_  a new sandwich. Not bad at all.   
  
Maybe he should let Ian hurt his feelings more often.


End file.
